i had decided to go to london instead of beijing after nami noticed how unhappy i was about going back to asia. strange that she had to point it out to me, suppose i've adjusted to seeing the future as already determined. since coming back to swat, i've increasingly felt this sense of resignation. hong kong was exciting, but not quite what i was looking for or expecting. the city really made me realize how existence is constructed by time and place, or just forces that you have no control over. which isn't to say meaning cannot be made of experiences and that there is no purpose to live. but. i'm definitely having trouble keeping myself going these days.
also ants have invaded our room and i keep feeling them on my arms and hands even though there aren't any there.
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hahaha you know that happened to me too(in our room). and i started getting mad paranoid about the ants on my legs and my leg would tingle as if the ants were crawling on it, and i would freak and shake my leg...and nothing would be there.
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